Dear Sweet Woman ~
People have always told me, "you are so hard on yourself," and I didn't get it. Seems like I have long had crazy high expectations of myself, compared myself to others, and felt "less than." I couldn't see my own worth, my own divine beauty and love-ability that comes just from being born.
After decades of overwhelm, perfectionism, numbing my feelings with food, and an eating disorder, I was dying inside. Over time and with a shit-ton of dedication, I finally started to see what others saw in me, and I began to embrace my self worth. I knew it was time to channel my passion into serving others, so In 2013, I became a Certified Health Coach, then later a Certified Professional Recovery Coach and She Recovers Designated Coach.
I know all about being crazy hard on yourself, feeling broken and thinking you SHOULD be doing things differently (AKA better), because this struggle continues to be my biggest life lesson.
When I was in my 20s, 30s, and 40s, I was ruled by a paralyzing limiting belief that I wasn't good enough. Not smart enough, not thin enough, not together enough. For years, my not-enoughness showed up largely through my eating disorder. I was brain-washed by society's ridiculously narrow definition of beauty, and I couldn't possibly ever be who I thought I was supposed to be (Hello, there's only ONE Jennifer Aniston!).
My self-care was at the bottom of the list, and anyway, how in the hell was I supposed to make that happen as a full-time, stay at home, HOMESCHOOLING mama? There was virtually no Kris time. My energy went towards cooking healthy meals, managing my kids' health with herbal concoctions and tinctures, and striving to provide rich, full lives for them.
Underneath it all, I was in pain and longing to be heard, but I had no idea how to feel my feelings or self-regulate. I was full of self-doubt and insecurity--until I couldn't stand it anymore. Then I figured out that instead of trying to outrun my pain, I needed to lean into it to move through it.
As I practice daily trauma-informed habits that soothe my nervous system, I teach women to do the same. We work on healing and recovery by identifying childhood wounds, dialoguing with their inner parts, recognizing trauma responses and limiting beliefs, and learning to hold themselves with radical self love instead of shame.
I've combined education, personal development, self-reflection and compassion to create the Radical Self-Compassion Coaching Method, where women learn to love all of their parts and own their gifts.
I teach the women I work with how to step out of struggle and into radical self-compassion.