Dear Sweet Woman ~
Every time I hear a woman say that she can't take time for herself or she needs to stop eating "bad foods" or if only she could get rid of her fat stomach, I want to cry. We are so unbelievably hard on ourselves! It is time for your suffering to end, and the healing process starts with self-compassion.
After a lifetime of overwhelm, perfectionism, numbing my feelings with food, and an eating disorder, I was dying inside. With time and a shit-ton of personal growth work, I learned to embrace my self worth. I knew it was time to channel my passion into serving others, so In 2013, I became a Certified Health Coach, then later a Certified Professional Recovery Coach and She Recovers Coach Designate.*
I know all about being crazy hard on yourself, feeling broken and thinking you SHOULD be doing things differently (AKA better), because I've lived it.
When I was in my 20s, 30s and yes, my 40s, I was drowning in the belief that I would never be good enough. Not smart enough, not thin enough, not together enough. One of the ways my not-enoughness showed up was through disordered eating and poor body image. Like most women in our culture, I've felt the pressure to look like someone else--to fit our society's ridiculously narrow definition of beauty. I felt horribly uncomfortable in my own skin, and I couldn't understand that my value was so much more than skin-deep..
My self-care was at the bottom of the list, and anyway, how in the hell was I supposed to make that happen as a full-time, stay at home, HOMESCHOOLING mama? There was virtually no Kris time; I was too busy over-functioning and taking care of everyone else. In many ways, I was disconnected from my body, my desires, and my joy.
Underneath it all, I was in pain and achingly alone, but I really had no idea how to manage my feelings, how to be uncomfortable. I was full of self-doubt and insecurity--until I couldn't stand it anymore. I figured out that trying to outrun my feelings was only perpetuating my pain, and what I really needed was to turn and face all of those feelings. I began the practice of radical acceptance: sitting in the discomfort of my feelings and moving through them with the help of positive coping skills and self-compassion. I learned to notice my thoughts and the stories I unconsciously told myself, and I changed my self-talk. I dug deep into childhood wounding and trauma and learned to parent my inner child and listen to her needs, and I grew to believe in and trust Adult Kris.
My specialty is guiding women to love themselves through the hard shit by shifting into radical self-love. We heal limiting beliefs, unlearn negative habits, and learn to make healthy choices that stem from compassion and tenderness instead of shame.
I've combined education, personal development, self-reflection and compassion to create the Radical Self Love Coaching Method, where women learn to embody radical self-love, to wholly embrace their "imperfections" (AKA their human-ness) and to transform their pain.
I teach the women I work with how to step out of struggle and into self-compassion. Radical Self Love happens along the way!
*I am a SHE RECOVERS® Coach, which means that I am trained in and my work aligns with the SHE RECOVERS® Intentions & Guiding Principles.
SHE RECOVERS® is an international movement of women in or seeking recovery from a wide variety of issues, including substance use and eating disorders, other behavioral health issues, trauma, abuse, codependency, cancer, grief, low self-esteem, perfectionism and other life challenges.